Somebody Please Cut Off My Head

listening to: yann tiersen – la noyee (somehow appropriate crazed-allergen music)

I’m dying. Okay, I’m not actually dying, but I think I might, say, just want to die a lot.

I’ve never had allergies this severe or this drippy or really just this gross in general, before. In fact, I’ve never really had allergies. Sure, when I have to crawl around in dusty rooms or clean out under my bed or something, my eyes water and my head gets stuffed up. But this is new, severe allergy attacks every few hours or so.

This craziness has been going on since Thursday morning, and it doesn’t seem to want to stop. The puffy eyes. The congestion. The endless running of the nose. I wonder what percentage of an entire tree I’ve destroyed through my rampant use of kleenex, alone, in the past four days. My mom was sauteeing onions last night, and I think that was the worst it’s ever been, the onion smoke in my eyes. Like, I had to restrain myself from jabbing my eyes out with my fingers, the moment it started getting to me.

This is some form of karma. I spent all of my time running around on Madeline Island smelling the (proverbial) flowers and drinking in the fresh air while I knew other people were suffering from allergies. I must need to suffer to make up for…not suffering. Okay, or maybe it’s the mold.

Oddly enough, it never occurred to me that I could actually take some histimine-blocking allergen medicine until last night. I don’t like taking drugs for small to moderate amounts of pain/suffering, just because my body is supposed to be armed to fight things like this off naturally, and I don’t like to interfere. But laying on a sofa moaning (and requesting for people to cut my head off via entry title) signals that drugs might actually be in order.

Nevermind, screw this. Slice my head off. I’m not asking you. I’m telling you. Do it.

*edit*

Bwahah! Jamie’s online! But Jamie’s also totally in Japan! I don’t believe that people can just magically be half-way across the country in 13 hours via airplane. To me, you’re not actually there unless you traveled every inch of the way in a vehicle that appears to be moving. Or maybe just suffered to earn it. What is it with me and suffering?

Chat excerpt–

Talia: Wow.

Talia: You’re in Japan.

Talia: That’s amazing.

Jamie: yes O___O I just looked out my window

Jamie: and there it was

Rebecca: XD

Jamie: it’s weird

Rebecca: OMG

Rebeccai: JAPAN IS OUTSIDE YOUR WINDOW

Talia: HAHA

Sod Off

listening to: bjork – verandi

Huttah, Carousel was cancelled. Sort of, anyway. I guess I’m happy, but it does leave me with considerably less to do tonight (read: nothing).

I practiced a crapload for the first time in a great while today. Shostakovich had me wanting to cry at the beginning of MIMC, but I think I can actually see myself finishing it and being able to perform it, which is nice. I’m also discovering amazing bow things going on in my right arm, which is encouraging.

In the last 24 hours or so, I’ve sunk into a growly, frustrated sort of mood. I think it has to do with the current lack of direction in my life. My being bitter towards everybody on the planet who has direction to their lives. My being bitter towards people with social lives. My feeling like I’m obnoxious and interefering. I really wish people would just come out and tell me to go the hell away if I annoy them. I hate it when I’m like this, because it owns me and makes me want to sit around and listen to nonsensical music all day. But what can I do but try and work with myself to get over it? Sometimes I wish I could just disappear. Or wreak havoc on the world. It might be fun if I could somehow manage both.

Aah, angry. But at least I can take out my bitterness in things like playing Shostokovich and running and bike-riding. Except not so much bike-riding while my bicycle tire could still kill me.

I think I’ll go sit in my room again, now.

Ve.Ran.Di

listening to: bjork – verandi

This song is FRIGGIN COOL. Where the hell have I been?!

Feeling frustrated by random crap but in the need to move and be productive, I went for a bike-ride. It was awesome. Bike-rides (and runs) spurned by anxious and crazy energy tend to be my most enjoyable. I have this tendancy to go absurdly fast on bike whenver I ride. I can’t help it. I just like to ride like hell. So I started out today really kicking it. I made it to the end of the Eastern part of the trail, about to curve away from GE Road, when I notice that my tire’s rotation looks awfully peculiar. I realize it can’t be bent, because it would be a lot more obvious, but am still concerned for my bike’s well-being. Further investigation reveals that the part of the tire just above the rim was actually tearing away. Hmm. And I’m, what, a good 7 miles from home? After observing further and mostly just prodding at it, I can see that the inner tube is still inflated and that whatever outer damage done has not effected the amount of air in the tire. But the tire is still pretty obviously effed up.

The next ten minutes is completely random: so there I am, coasting down this hill as slowly as possible, wondering when the tire’s gonna blow and kill me and repeating aloud–half seriously, half amused–“holy shit holy shit holy shiiit…” when who else would I see approaching me on the trail but…Mrs. Corpus!! I talk to her for a few minutes, before returning to my unbelievable crawl of a ride. Some runners pass me, making me bitter, since I had probably flown by them earlier, the bloody runners. Then I ride past Jummers (er, the chataeu. whatever) and find that somebody is playing the bloody bagpipes. BAGPIPES. Right, end of amusing story.

Carousel went well, though it was a little on the chilly side for an outdoor musical in July (dear July, wtf? sincerely, outdoor musical pit-musician). My allergies were going crazy again, so I swear I spent half the first act flaunting my i-have-to-friggin-sneeze face, and the second act sniffling (which was bad timing since what’s-his-face dies in the second act, and I swear I kept getting heart-felt smiles). I took a slightly longer route home, because I love my car and stick-shift still has its mysteries to me. Mysteries like this one. Somehow (twice, in fact), when going down from third gear after slowing down for a red-light that decided to turn green, I ended up going into FOURTH gear, instead of SECOND. But the weird thing was that the car didn’t care, so I didn’t notice for a while. At least, not until I realize that I’m going like 40 mph at 2000 rpm which shouldn’t exactly happen.

Sign I should stop talking about stick-shift in my blog, or even just cars: search-referalls like this. And also this.

Oh god I have to go read manga…

Famous Shoujo Manga Last Words

listening to: the sea & cake – hotel tell

Sigh.

JaMeg have now officially embarked on their journey to Japan. I know I’m going to miss them, terribly. But I also know that I’d go to Japan instantly, given the chance. Online communication isn’t for nothing, though. Neither is the fact that I’m babysitting a good portion of my weight in manga. Still. Sabishiku narundayo ne, watashi.

Carousel was cancelled last night, due to the weather. So I watched an old tape of Gakkou e Ikou, listened to Stereolab, organized some stuff in my room, and found myself distracted by Koucha Ouji often enough. Awesome enough, I discovered that in one of the last KO chapters, I had been missing a scanned page amidst some really good stuff and MAN was I happy to discover that. EEE! Also quite notable, I managed to consolidate space in my room by throwing out most of the 8 million Hana to Yume mags I had laying around. Replaced them with more manga and found that all the manga in my posession now takes up two shelves on my book-case. I’m going to estimate I have something like 250 tankouban right now. Which probably seems sick to you, if you’re reading this.

I think I’ve stopped having absurd Wisconsin dreams (or Madeline-Island-in-rustic-Italy dreams…), which is significant because I swear I’ve had a dream a night about Madeline Island or JaMeg’s cabin every night since getting back.

If anybody needs another verification of the cuteness of Koucha Ouji, allow me: CUUUUUUTE.

Wow And Flutter

listening to: stereolab – wow and flutter (live ’93)

I could go off about how much I love Stereolab, but I’ll can it this time, for my own good. All I will mention is that I nearly had a heart-attack when I discovered that Stereolab has done three different cover versions of Brian Eno’s “St. Elmo’s Fire”. Now if only I could miraculously get ahold of them…

I have promised to send music to many-a-person, and have been completely negligent to this promise so far. So, in order to remind myself this all needs to be done for the better of the world before I leave for NY on Monday, I will leave a note for myself here. Right. People I need to send CDs to: Rebecca, Devin, … um … whoa, who else DO I need to send music to? I gave Michelle her two mix CDs (though I never got around to emailing her track-lists since there really wasn’t computer access at camp…). Jamie and Megan have two Stuart Davis CDs waiting for them here, plus another mix…who else? What else? I totally let Christiana have into my Stereolab and Tori Amos CDs at camp…so what the hell am I talking about? Obviously not what I thought I was. Damn you, memory and stupid tangents! So, right. Rebecca and Devin will have their CDs sent out to them before I leave for NY on Monday. On my word.

And…hell. I said I wouldn’t go off about how I love Stereolab, but it was a big fat lie. Just WATCH me ramble about it. Okay. The three factors which are key in my liking music is as follows, in no particular order: rhythm, harmonic movement, texture. As Stereolab’s music progresses throughout the years, so does their rhythm. I think at first I didn’t like the earlier album Mars Audiac Quartet because it was so straight-forward in rhythm. Emporer Tomato jumped up several levels and left me completely digging the rhythm. Dots and Loops kicks the ass of standard pop-music rhythm styles. The use of 5 instead of 4 is A.MA.Zing. Then there’s harmonic movement. Stereolab has had this all the time. It’s what drew me into Mars Audiac Quartet when the rhythm failed to do so as it had with Dots and Loops. The harmonic progressions have a definite tinge of standard rock/pop in them, but they manage to really catch me off guard when I’m listening just right. I can usually predict where a standard rock tune would be heading, but Stereolab completely kicks my ass when it comes to that. The direction of the notes usually leaves me hanging wanting more. I love that. As for texture, I think it’s all in the instrumentation. That particular style of guitar combined with the keyboads/electric organs kills me. In the good way. It’s just this perfect package of experimental/progressive Euro…stuff! Augh! LURRVE.

It’s rambles like that that totally leave me understanding why nobody reads my blog anymore. I honestly don’t blame them. But hell, STEREOLAB!

Nnnnnn Stereolab!

listening to: stereolab – brigitte

Ohmigod I’m using Netscape for the first time in months and…blogger!! You’ve gone crazy! At least now the text wraps itself as I type it. I believe that’s why I stayed away from Netscape. Maaan, I hate OS 9.

Finally seem to have overcome today’s battle with allergies. Thank god. Or whatever.

Went out to lunch with JaMeg. Mmm, Panera. The past three times I’ve been to Panera, I’ve gotten the Portabello and Mozzerella panini. I don’t think I’ll ever stop eating that sandwich, either. They have perfected the herbs/cheese/mushroom relationship in a way I don’t think I could ever recreate on my own. Mmm. And…CIYS-Matt works there, and I definitely haven’t seen him since Sounds of Christmas! It was exciting. He put my order name down as “Talia the Great”, which I found entertaining. I miss that kid.

I think my digital camera is on its way out of this world. It would once occasionally freeze up upon taking a photo and require the batteries to be removed and inserted again in order to start up. Now it seems it can’t function without freezing up on me. Plus, the thing was just sort of big and clunky, not to mention old. I’m thinking of asking for a new one for my birthday. I have no idea what I should go for, though. Any suggestions? Comments? Anything?!

(The underlying message here is that somebody should comment to prove that they not only really exist, but are verifying my own existence by reading my blog. RAR)

Make Them Opposites So There’s A Reason

listening to: stereolab – les yper sound (live, bbc)

This is the coolest version of Les Yper Sound, EVAR. Random extra 2 minutes of weird backbeat noise. Rah! I acquired this live CD yesterday and DROOOOL. So good.

Before I mention anything else, I will just say that I have come across the coolest blog. EVAR.

Mleh. I must have slept for a total of like four hours last night, thanks to the combination of stagnant air in my room, allergies, and crazy half-dreams about Wisconsin. Really, though, I think this must be the worst time of the year for me with allergies. It may have something to do with mold, with the absurd humidity and what have you. I just hate it because I really only want to sleeeep!

Rehearsal last night was…um. It was. I’m getting sick of Carousel. It’s to the point where I have to keep reminding myself how bad Big last year was, in order to feel better. But really, it’s just not that great a show. The music is less than interesting, to me. Like, there are all these harmonic resolutions where I just think to myself “God, even I could have written something more interesting…”. I feel especially bad for the drummer. Who just like…sits there, and occasionally taps something, and then gets right back to sitting there. The bass player, too. I share in the experience of having had to play bass-lines like that. The kind where you play either on the beat or off the beat and not much else. I actually decided a few days back that I would much rather have to play a boring cello part than a boring bass part, because boring bass parts (ones that provide the bare-minimum in harmonic support) almost aren’t worth it.

I’m not making a knock at the actors (except for the age-discrepency thing. I’m definitely making a knock at that). All the teenage actors tend to be really good, especially the main few. The adult dudes, too. Well, the main ones. There are like…all these random old-guys playing town officials or policemen or something and I just want to ask them why they’re doing this in the first place. But…as is normal, I like to whine.

Amongst other bits of crap to blog about, I am really enjoying driving my car. Really. For one thing, I learned to drive on a Ford Aerostar. Those things are giant and have the aerodynamics/handling of a giant shoe-box. So this dwarf of a Focus station-wagon is a joy to drive. Also, stick-shift and I are finding eachother quite well. Yesterday I drove through an area that was far more traffic-plagued than I normally would and…wow. Go me. I’m actually finding myself thinking a little bit ahead of traffic and my own driving, just because you sort of have to do that when you shift your own car’s gears. It’s weird but it’s definitely making me less meek in traffic.

Ugh. Allergies.

Durr!

listening to: television – marquee moon

You know, I’m contemplating inserting the most inane nonsense possible into my entries just to spur quizzical (or ANY) comments out of people…

Didn’t get too far in the cleaning of the room. It’s not like I didn’t try, but every time I did try, I ended up sitting on my bed reading a manga. So, really, even if I didn’t clear my shelves off or clean out drawers, I did inventory all of this recently-acquired manga. … But mostly, I read Sensei! and Kanata kara. My mom isn’t hacked off at me for putting things off. Yet. So I guess I have a little more time to bide before I actually have to clean my room. Isn’t it sad that most of my methodical thoughts now revolve around putting off cleaning or reading manga?

So maybe I’m boring, but at least I can start a good “your mom” joke rolling wherever I go…

*immediately after entering the chat*

Jamie: you’re right amy, you win

Rebecca: i agree

Talia: your mom wins

Amy: XD

Rebecca: in bed

Talia: Hahaha!

Jamie: that’s not what she said last night >O

Check out this…thing, spotted in central Maryland.

Whoa! And happy birthday, Lucia!1!!!

Sensei! Lurve

listening to: tori amos – blue skies

Aaaaaaah allergies!!

Today I’m going to attempt cleaning the shelves in my room, to make way for the manga I’m babysitting. I haven’t cleaned my room in like a year (what with the not living at home), so I’m really a wee bit frightened of all the prospective pack-rat crap that’s sitting there. I can’t help being a pack-rat, but it makes cleaning stuff completely insane.

I’m reading people’s blog archives. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy. Huttah.

I wish I were a gardener.

I also wish I had my Sandman comics ;_;

Gah. I don’t understand what’s happening in Global Garden at all. I think the main problem is that this just isn’t a manga which I can skim through and still understand the gist of things. What I mostly don’t understand is Ruika’s gender-bending problem…thing. Or really, even the concept of Robin’s existence. Admittedly, that would be a good manga to translate because then I would actually force myself to pick up an understanding of the plot.

On the other hand, I completely lurve Sensei!

So. Boring.

I Came As Ice

listening to: carousel…in my head

Carousel rehearsal was really long tonight. And also painful. It seems that the venues where I end up playing for 1+ hours coincidentally have chairs which have had some touch of Satan. But Jeff was there tonight! Apparently he only got back from Italy earlier this morning, too, the jerk.

After rehearsal I drove to Jamie and Megan’s, and then ended up driving the three of us plus Jason to Steak’n’Shake. Which was oddly crowded for 10:30pm. We ended up sitting there for a while and talking about…well…Japan, mostly.

I have to say, my stick-shift driving skills are improving in good ways. As was mentioned, I ended up driving us to Steak’n’Shake on Vernon, and then dropping Jason off at his house, only doing two serious stupids, but neither of which involved the car being in motion. First, as I was trying to leave JaMeg’s house, I put the car into gear and wondered what the hell was wrong when it wouldn’t move, and then even worse, why it seemed to WANT to move, but wouldn’t. Then I realized the emergency break was on *shii—n* Then, I stalled in Jason’s driveway, simply because I forgot to go into neutral before breaking completely.

GASP!! Dan Winckler (who, if he finds my blog through tracking or Technorati, should know that he is my blogging and Brian Eno hero) has made the move of the month at the official House Gymnastics site (which I have notably just introduced to Rob).

I’m caffeinated. In a serious way. So I think I’m going to go read.

"To Have A Soul You Gotta Suffer"

listening to: deathcab for cutie – friday i’m in love (cure cover)

This song kind of sucks compared to um, the original. Apparently there was this “tribute to the cure” concert held back in ’99, where this cover was recorded. Interestingly enough, I also have an mp3 of Dismemberment Plan doing Close to Me, sounding nothing like the originally, but still v cool. Hee, and I like that the guy at chromewaves.net refers to them as “the usually reliable Deathcab for Cutie”. Honestly, I have yet to fully appreciate Deathcab. Maybe they’re not my band or maybe I just haven’t heard enough.

Beh. Stayed up until the wee hours of the morning, reading volumes 1-12 of Sensei, leaving me completely cranky when I woke up this morning. But…so good!! Ugh. Damn all this manga I’m reading!

Hmm. Something I’ve pondered over occasionally: I’ve had some people tell me that I’m lucky knowing what I want to do, going into college, and having a specific major to depend on. And they’re right. It’s just ducky having a plan. But there’s a part of me that wishes –more than anything else– to be able to go to school and experiment and learn and attempt to prod for an idea of what I want to do for the future. Instead of getting to school and going “Oop, gotta practice! And do music theory!” to the point where life becomes practicing and doing music theory. Especially having been told (and thoroughly believing) that I need to be doing a good four hours a day of cello-practicing. I really wish I could just get out and have some scholastic…fun? Ending whining…now.

Er, almost. It really irritates me that we’ve started getting junk-mail through our fax-machine. Would you like to win a trip to the Carribean? NO I WOULD NOT. STOP FAXING US CRAP!

Oh Hell…Have Some Chocolate

listening to: brian eno – from the same hill

I swear I heard an Eno song in some Subway commercial just a few minutes, ago…whatever. I’m crazy.

So…yeah. I would have actually updated my left-hand links, instead of just saying that I had but…well…I guess I’m ftp-defective.

It is officially tech week for Miller Park Summer Theater. Meaning I was able to enjoy 3+ hours of Carousel tonight. Whoopee! You know, actually, I will say that this show is amazingly better than Big was last year. I think the pit is better. The cast is better. Things just feel and move…better. That didn’t prevent me from forming a less than awesome opinion of the actual story, itself. I’m sorry but…the guy dies!! I don’t care if he gets to contribute a remainder of the plot from heaven, he dies (If I’ve just spoiled the plot of Carousel for you, well…GOOD. You probably deserve it for…something. Shaddup)! Also kind of weird about the production itself is that…all of the adult female characters are being played by girls. Like, teenage girls. And all the main adult male characters are played by…middle-aged men who I’m pretty sure work for State Farm. But…I’ll respect this because, um…I’m awesome?

I’m thinking of re-writing the “about” page. Again. And making the “pertinent information about me” column into the infamous “100 things about me” list.

I’m just so interesting. Which is exactly why you’re reading this. Not because you feel social obligations to me at aaall, ooooh no.

Sigh. I’m going to bed.

Brain Sludge

listening to: maritime – adios (again, because my playlist is limited)

Look. I updated the left-hand links. Yay me.

I’m so boring.

I think I’m going to buy Margarine Eclipse, because maybe Stereolab will make me feel less boring and hopeless.

I’m So Full Of Ideas, And Here Is A Good One

listening to: stereolab – international colouring contest

I have just discovered all the Stereolab media that on this site. Happy girl. Except Cybele’s Reverie doesn’t seem to want to work. Rrrr.

Just got off the phone with Lucia. Again, happy girl.

Right. So, I don’t know who actually reads my blog anymore, nor is it a very pressing issue, but I am going to re-do the links to the left, seeing as many people have changed push-button publishing venues, or have completely ceased to blog. If you still plan to blog, but just choose not to and want your link to remain, let me know. Likewise, if you don’t see a link to your page up and you want one, also let me know.

So apparently, they’re finding ways of turning blood into milk, coffee and chocolate… (via boingboing.net)

Shostakovich "Zuh" Factor

listening to: stereolab – diagonals

I keep listening to the same songs over and over again because this computer has about 60 songs on it, which on shuffle probably doesn’t get me far, as opposed to the 1,000+ that are on my computer. Still, Stereolab. Rah!

Last night, because Kira and Rachael were already in town for JaMeg‘s going-away party happening today, we got together, had some random fun, and ended up going to see Spiderman 2. There was general r0nking, seeing as I don’t get to see Kira very often, and I’d NEVER met Rachael (who is v. v. cool). Plus, putting a primarily-Chicago-suited driver into Bloomington-Normal was amusing. Especially one with a car that starts from a distance. Holy crap.

Afterward, I thought to myself, “to hell with going straight home, I have a car that I need to be able to drive by tomorrow”, so I drove around on the extremely empty streets of Northern Normal, just to get to know my car at greater speeds without traffic surrounding me at all times. It was great. Just about twenty minutes out on some empty residential and rural roads, listening to the Lonesome Crowded West and practicing my shifting skills.

And true to the nature of practice, I felt a lot more secure, driving down Main St amidst a moderate amount of traffic, this afternoon on my way to the first rehearsal for Carousel. I had one very minor incident (driving up a hill, approaching a line of cars beginning to accelerate after a stop-sign. By the time I got to them, I could see I would probably have to stop and start from 1st gear again, thus leaving a the prospect of rolling into the cars behind me. Well, I got to 1st gear the moment the cars in front of me started to move. So I panicked, overly aware of the hill, and accidentally STALLED. Bwah. I was just thankful the cars behind me were understanding enough not to like…suck about the whole thing), but nothing else to stop me from feeling a lot better about my shifting! Huttah!

The rehearsal itself was okay, considering. It felt really weird playing the cello in a musical instead of the bass, seeing as I ended up doing Footloose, Forever Plaid (x2) and Big last year on bass. But whatever. All was well. There’s actually another cellist, from Bloomington High, which I guess is nice. I felt like the silly big-sister or something, screwing up with counting more than I would like to admit, and then being very funny about it afterward. Cool enough is the fact that Megan my mother’s awesome oboe-student is playing, and apparently tomorrow we will be joined by the infamous Juillard Jeff!! I’m sure he would have been here today had he not been on his way back from Spoleto Italy (the jerk). Sigh. I want to play in Spoleto Italy. Aaanyway…

After leaving the rehearsal around 3:30, I went to JaMeg‘s Farewell party, ate lots of lovely food, chatted with lots of lovely people, and generally had a lovely time. An earlier request to bring my cello and play fell through when everyone just sort of forgot the prospect. Yeah. I know I’m student of music and should follow through with even the smallest chance to perform and whatnot but…I was really glad I ended up not playing. It’s not like I didn’t want to, it’s mainly just that I didn’t have anything prepared, or anything I really wanted to present to an audience that may or may not be familiar with completely whacked out 20th Century cello compositions. Like the Britten cello suite or something. I can already imagine the “I have no idea what was just happening” responses I would recieved, cloaked in applause and an appreciation for trying. It’s like last year, where a plethora of my non-Shostakovich-acquainted friends had to sit through the cello sonata and go “zuh?” (aside: I don’t necessarily blame them, either).

I stuck around until after everyone left the party, as did Jason, who is back from Japan for a short few days. We ended up sitting around and chatting about odds and ends, and then going to Walmart for a bit. Because of course, when you’re about to leave for Japan for a year or three, the shopping never ends. … Not that I’m the one going to Japan or anything…

Not as though I don’t want to go to Japan. Sigh. But then, I should take solace in the fact that I don’t have to bother with buying people omiyage *shudders at thought*

I Don’t Feel And I Feel Great I Sold My Atlas By The Freight Stairs

listening to: modest mouse – trucker’s atlas

Oh God. Most nerve-wracking driving experience, EVAR.

I thought, to test my hopefully-improving stick shift skillz0rz, I would go pick up my music for Carousel, which I had been told was left on the director’s porch, along with everybody else’s un-picked-up music. Well, things had been going seemingly well. I’d avoided other cars for quite some time, and was feeling pretty good about my shifting. But then, I did a very unlike-me thing, and completely drove past the turn-off street, to get to the directors house. Well, lah dee dah, the next street going right was definitely a really big, scary four-laner, whcih I was extremely nervous about driving on (Emerson). So anyway, I manage to frantically turn out into Emerson, and then turn at the very next right. At which point I realized the street was a dead-end. At which point four rabbits ran out in front of me at the same time, all coming from different directions.

I managed to pull back into big-scary-four-laner, and find the next right, which fortunately turned out to be a veritible street. Well, I finally manage to find the street the director lives on, but could NOT for the life of me figure where her house was, and had no intentions of turning around any more times than I had, in search of it. I like to think, for my own sanity, that the vegitation just sort of swallowed it. So I went home. A kind of thoughtless route, considering the whole likely-to-roll-backward-into-cars-when-stopped-on-hills situation. I had to stop, twice, going uphill. Fortunately with no cars behind me. Then I got to a stop-light on a hill, with somebody extremely close to me. Somehow, through sheer adrenaline or fear or SOMETHING, I managed to get into moving-first without going backward. It was amazing. But then, coming back to my neighborhood on a street parallel to my own, some ass decided that 35 mph on a quiet street definitely wasn’t fast enough for him, so he started riding my rear and moving around as much as possible as though looking to see if he could pass me as long as no other cars were coming. Bah.

So I managed to get home in one piece, with only one stalling-experience (around where I almost hit four rabbits), but with no music (I’ll just get it tomorrow when I see her, anyway). Oh God. How on earth does my sister drive a standard-transmission car in CHICAGO?! I should call her for non-frantic driving advice.

Anyway, I’m off now, to bother Jamie and Megan, possibly going to see Spiderman 2, along with Rachael and Kira! Woo!

Nyeh. I think I’ll DRIVE there. In my STICK-SHIFT CAR. Nyeheheh!

(note: Jamie and Megan live two blocks from me).

Talia: 0; Mac OS 9: 10,000

listening to: brian eno – by this river

I’m about to give this computer the smack-down.

Sunburn sucks. I got a pretty good frying on my back and shoulders from an innocent bike-ride I took a couple days ago. It’s this rather unfortunate combination of itch and pain, at this point. I think my using outdated sunscreen might have had something to do with this. Or maybe I just didn’t use enough. In any case, that’ll teach me to…do stuff.

I really really really like Interpol. Really. But…urk! They remind me way too much of Iowa City. I wish I didn’t associate the music I discover with the place in which I discover it. I’ve convinced myself that I’ll never shake wanting to be in the original place I heard it as I listen to it. Maybe this just requires me to obtain new music and listen to it when I’m…in other places. Like…I should obtain something new right before I go to New York.

Holy crap. My parents are going to L.A. right after we get back from New York. Without me. I don’t mind the “without me” part so much. But…oh god! I’ll be home alone. For several days. By myself. Did I mention that this would make me home alone? But, hey, what am I talking about? After all, I’m the one who lived through 18 days without my parents, as they toured Austria with the faculty wood-wind group. And like…at the most, a consecutive 9 weeks without parental contact, at school…so have I just declined in mental age by like five years or something?! I don’t know. I’m weird.

I’m so terrified of traffic right now. But I have to learn to drive my stick-shift car in actual traffic. Not just parking lots and quiet streets. Durr…

Oh Alexander I See You Beneath The Archway Of Aerodynamics

listening to: the pixies – alec eiffel

Durr, blogger!

Got around to seeing Fahrenheit 9/11, which was a good experience (although it secretly made me want to move to Iceland or Sweden or someplace where there is generally less political stupidity). I’ve got to say that generally when it comes to our general dealings in war and Iraq, I really haven’t had the full picture. I’ve tried to follow the news and the events of course, but knowing the names and political connections and just the background of everything that’s happened makes the difference. And to those who say that Michael Moore is a minipulative bastard of a film-maker, he’s just doing what he’s good at. Honestly, the fact that the footage in that movie exists at all is enough to make a difference to me. Michael Moore just exploits it all amazingly well.

Sarah sent a link to everybody from camp (and their mother, it seems) for some wikked awesome instrument jokes. I’m really getting a kick out of the accordion jokes…

If you drop an accordion, a set of bagpipes and a viola off a 20-story building, which one lands first?

Who cares?

Okay. Moving on…

I think I’m back on a translating roll. Oh, except for the fact that I’m already stuck in a few unbelievable translating ditches, as it is. One is a kanji I can’t seem to identify no matter how many raticals I think I sort through. Another is the katakana “pa–“. If you speak Japanese and wish to offer help…um…yeah. What the hell does “pa–” mean?

I had the weirdest dream last night. I dreamt that I was on Madeline Island, but it wasn’t really an island, but in the middle of Wisconsin. And Wisconsin was really in some crazy and rustic part of Europe. I believe I was amidst a witching/wizardry school, in some completely historic but falling apart buildings in the middle of a mountainous and mysterious forest. But we were a very secretive witching/wizardry school, because suddenly a bus filled with college students came to research the area, and we had to hide everything from them, instantly. But then there were people I knew who had come to research the area, and I somehow gave away that I could fly, and so I was kicked out of the school. Sad. Somehow my alarm clock worked its way into the dream and I ended up sleeping in until about 11. Frowl.

Whoa, okay. Extensive googling has made it clear to me that “pa–” is really probably “par”. Which…you know, makes sense. Hmm…although from what I’m seeing, it seems to be most closely related to golf, when used in Japanese. Uuum, I’ll pretend otherwise for the moment, maybe.

Adventures In Driving Red Ford Station Wagons

listening to: tori amos – black swan

This is one of those Tori songs that I’ve had on my playlist for a really long time, but haven’t come to appreciate until now. Tooooori!

Nnn. Managed to stay up until about 3:30am, finishing up Deathstalker Honor and starting into Deathstalker Destiny. I have a very…foreboding feeling about the ending of the series. And not merely because of the stupid prophecy some esper made about Owen’s “destiny” and well…everything else I’ve read. Having invested so many unbelievably late nights and long days and energy and emotion into this series, I would really like for it to end well, but I’m pessemistic enough that I don’t believe it will happen (note: if you have already read this series and are reading my blog and laughing at me because you know things, sod off!)

Something really trivial: I tend to have problems forming character images in my head. Mostly voicing. I know you don’t necessarily need that in reading books, but for some reason I do. Anyway, the author of the Deathstalker series, Simon R Green, is British. Should I be thinking of the character voicing as also being British? I haven’t been. Well, half the time I do and half the time I don’t. Like, with the random off-characters that usually end up being killed (a lot) or just never showing up again, they sound British when their dialogues are running through my head. But the main characters don’t. But they use all kinds of little bits of language that obviously belong to UK speakers (ie: “bloody”, “bugger off”, lots of other things).

Okay I’m going to…stop. I really want my own irrelevency alarm. Really. Get me one. You know you want to.

Sigh. Had to get up early to wash my car (read: Tadousha) before Insurance Guy came to look at it (Review of history of Talia’s car: My parents bought this used red 2001 Ford Focus station wagon back in April, with intentions of letting me use it in the future. The thing about the car is that it has a standard transmission with stick-shift, something which I really never had experienced before. Anyway, I got home from school and started learning the ways of stick-shift slowly but thoroughly. Everything was happy and wonderful until Erica embarked on a journey to South Carolina in our family’s VW Jetta, where a timing belt blew around Louisville, KY. Seeing as all our other cars are old and used and majorly falling apart in some way or another, my dad felt that the only car fit for her to continue the journey was *sob* my Focus. Of course there was nothing I could do about this, and of course I realize my sister needs a car, so I part ways with my car. Well, two days later, Erica calls to inform us that the battery in my car died, mysteriously. Of course the battery dieing sucked for Erica, but my sister had had a fairly bumpy relationship with all of the other Ford automobiles we’d owned. Specifically a red Taurus station wagon. We all thought that maybe this red Focus station wagon thing didn’t bode too well. Cut to about a month later, where my sister is now back in Chicago, still driving the Focus. Mind you, she lives in the city, not the suburbs. Anyway, approaching an intersection one day, she hears sirens, and sees an ambulance coming behind her. She gets over as far as possible, and slows down when she feels she’s out of the way, only to be slammed into from behind by a random Chicago-driver, who proceeds to tell her to pull over so they can talk, and then drives off. She is fine, but the rear-bumper managed to get itself pretty thoroughly destroyed. Cut to a week or so later, the Focus is back at home again, and my mother is going to drive it up Heller Ford to have a minor repair done, as well as an estimate for the bumper damage. Well, lah dee dah, the weather breaks loose on this day. Not only does my mother actually see the tornado that did in that factory near Roanoke as she’s driving to El Paso, but she gets completely hailed on. The hail gets to the hood and top of the car, leaving a few extremely excellent dents in it. So while she’s having an estimate on bumper repair done, my mom decides to ask them about the hail damage, too. The estimates turn up as such: bumper damage – $880, hail damage – $1200. Woo freakin’ hoo! Thus concluding the story of my car. I’m just starting to drive it again, what with the practicing stick-shift. I can drive the thing, but I have problems not sliding into people behind me and generally dealin with traffic. Hopefully this will all change, soon enough). Thanks to my mother’s desire to be thorough, the thing ended up being washed twice, basically. V frustrating, but effective, I guess.

So I guess I’m going to be playing cello for the Miller Park Theater production of Carousel, next week. I don’t know how I feel about it, other than the fact that money is good, and I believe we all get paid for this. I just hope nobody else gets shot, this year. Of course, it could in turn lead to an excellent spur-of-the-moment rap about some guy getting shot, again!!

(aside: for those of you who wonder about the car karma in my family, my sister’s VW Jetta died two days ago from a malfunctioning fuel pump. The end.)

All This Time With The Marquee Moon, But Just Waitin’

listening to: television – marquee moon

Mlrah! Deathstalker is making me boring! I’m obsessing so much with the series that I’m forgetting about other, interesting and possibly even important things in life.

I mean, that’s okay with me and all but…god I’m boring. Me and my blog and my conversations.

I’m sorry if you’re reading this right now. Why on earth are you reading this right now? Go do something engaging that is not reading my blog. Shoo!

Clock Is Set To Nine But You Know You’re Gonna Make It Eight

listening to: interpol – leif erikson

Interpol is one of those bands that confuse me internally. I can’t figure out whether I went to be a total outright fan of them and spread their musical goodness throughout everybody, or whether I quietly want to have them all to myself and attempt to ignore every annoying piece of fan-information out there. I actually had a brief conversation about this last night–some of my favorite bands becoming popular, and me really wanting to keep them to myself and thus having to ignore media and other fans. Like Modest Mouse. Holy crap, I love them. But suddenly, so does everybody else. I think I should feel lucky that I so far have had R.E.M.’s fandom all to myself just because I’m a somewhat of a musical recluse.

Last night I ended up at Rob’s house, along with Justin, Matt, Stephanie and the Mike’s, where we watched what I think was one of the best movies ever! Shaolin Soccer! Seriously. It was so…good/bad!!! To me, honestly, it was just like a shounen manga. I mean, JUST like a shounen manga. It wasn’t just a live-action recreation of a shounen manga, it simply WAS the transferred version of a soccer manga. Soo good. If you get the chance to see it, make sure you do!

Yeah. I’ve missed Rob. As Justin and I were leaving, he jumped up from the sofa where he was sitting, took two giant leaps, and managed to grab me for a hug. Nyah, but being as he just sort of leaped up with no regards to balance, he ended up practically landing on me in an extremely less-than-balanced sort of way, causing me to hold both our weight and almost fall several times. Maan, I missed my friends.

Then I came home, and stayed up until about 2 watching Sliding Doors. Not that I minded staying up that late, since I lurve that movie. I will just say that John Hannah is one of my favorite people (though sadly that might just be because of his accent, stupid Scots and their stupid accents).

Hmm. Have been checking out Tokyo Jihen‘s site, and I must say that I’m actually becoming very excited about this whole “Shiina Ringo joins band” thing…

Is it just me, or have a lot of bloggers just sort of stopped blogging (at least amongst the people I know)? Of course a lot of the original bloggers still blog. I mean, the people who have been there since the very beginning, or at least not far from it. But everybody who’s acquired a blog in the last couple years may or may not have abandonded their push-button publishing abilities to sit. It’s sad because I liked reading everybody’s writing, but at the same it makes me feel awesome for having stuck with it for over two years, myself. Whatever. I’d rather just have everybody blogging again!! BLOG, PEOPLE! DAMMIT!

Geh! My mom is mowing the lawn but all I can smell in the air is the Creeping Charlie that has replaced most of our lawn. Blech!

Link: Propeller Island City Lodge

Hee!! Let’s Get Together With Our Accordions Sometime And POLKA OUT!!!~

listening to: yaida hitomi – mikansei no melody

Musicwhore.org has Yaida Hitomi in some way related to Shiina Ringo, which is why I obtained this song. The feel is more Do As Infinity to me, but that’s just me. Arg. I feel a random j-rock binge coming on. Run while you still have time.

Laah! *peruses j-rock news items*

What WHAAAAt?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!

OMFG. Shiina Ringo has joined a band. Oh. My. God.

*shiiiin* Okay, dear self, stop freaking out. I honestly just have no idea what to think. I mean, okay, I suppose it’s not going to make that big a difference in anything but fandom. In fact, the band is supposedly just all the musicians she’s been touring with. Ringo will still be singing vocals. As for fandom, I’ll still be able to go “rah rah Shiina Ringo”, I’ll just have to add a little bit of space in my fandom for “rah rah Tokyo Jihen” (the name of her new band).

Although…it is a little bit sad. It’s like she’s moving on from the collection of unbelievably cool, returning musical ideas that have been haunting her albums and singles for the past three or so years. Man. She even removed her trade-mark mole, for which she named a DVD after…

Then again, interestingly enough, I was so unbelievably pleased about Karuki Zamen, and have analyzed and obsessed with that title enough that on some level, I never WANTED her to release another album (or even believed she might). I always wanted Karuki Zamen to be the ultimate on my list (which I know sounds completely useless and shallow, but mwah). And now it is! Also, we know that Shiina Ringo is a brilliant musician, and if she’s been working with her band-mates for this long, I can’t doubt that whatever they release is going to be good. Gooooood. So pardon me while I go mark my calendar for their debut single release on the 8th of September…

Best Picture EVAR!!!!1!



Lucia and I, before the last Borromeo concert. Admittedly, I look a lot crazier than I would have hoped when the picture was taken but…I can live with that. Pleasing.

(This picture sinisterly stolen from Kim).

The Natural Disasters Make It Hard To Mind Birthday Cake, Steak and Wine…

listening to: enon – natural disasters (seemingly appropriate song for the moment)

Dear Weather,

WHAT THE HELL?!

Sincerely, Central Illinois

Yeah. I was just sitting here. Chatting with a few people. I’d noticed that the weather was looking a little funny, so I went outside to close the windows of the Audi, figuring it would probably be raining hellishly, soon enough. After a while more of sitting and computing, I was becoming a little freaked out by the distinctly growing sound of thunder. I got up for a moment to see if there was anything happening that the telly couldn’t inform me of, all the while wary of the extremely dark sky to the East. Lo and behold, tornado warning for McLean Co. Ah, the joys of living in Tornado Alley. Frequent drops into those red alerts of doom, usually just falling prey to strong winds and insistent rains.

Suddenly the power flickered, and that’s when everything went to hell. Walking back to see that the computer had indeed shut itself down (improperly, so the thing informed me upon it being restarted. Lah dee dah), the power flickered a couple more times, as the winds most definitely grew. Suddenly the phone rang. It was my mom, who had taken a car (my car) up to Heller Ford in El Paso. She informed me that she’s actually SEEN a tornado touch down, up there, and the hail had done a number on my car (frowl). The moment I hung up the phone, sirens started going off, the winds picked up and the lightning was going completely crazy. I carried the birds (w/cages) into the basement, grabbed the mini-radio and a flashlight, and sat.

Occasionally, I would get up to peer out the window at the clouds, which were going every-which-way. You could actually spot rotations in them, which every time I did spot, fled to the basement once again. The radio insisted that there were rotations everywhere, and that a tornado could potentially be in any one of those rotations. Later, they said they had actually spotted a larger one over Red-bird Arena, a whole half-mile from my house.

Currently, the weather is beautiful, with clear skies and a slightly less humid and uncomfortable air. Thanks, weather.

I was actually just out checking out the damage done to my car. Well, okay, interestingly enough, the damage was done right before my mom got to Heller Ford in El Paso, to have some other damage surveyed. Alright. So, the damage to the bumper from the hit-and-run accident my sister was in somewhere in Chicago: $881. The damage done from hail on the hood and top of the car: $1,200. Excellent. Once again, thanks, weather.

Man, my car has certainly had an exciting week. None of the excitement I had been behind the wheel for, luckily.

I think I’m going to name it “Tadousha”. “Ta” for Talia and “dousha” for “jidousha” meaning “car”. Tadousha.

Haha! Excellent search-referall: “cow pillow really i’m fine”. Thank you, strange googler!