Through The Bogs And Through The Briars

listening to: brian eno – st. elmo’s fire

In the very wee hours of the morning, I decided I’d had enough of my unbelievably messy and unorganized collection of books and music laying about, so around 12:30 I started sorting and organizing. An hour or so later, my room looked like all hell, but I had a sort of satisfying idea of how many CDs I’d acquire throughout the school-year. So…here is the general list. I think this is pretty accurate, minus a few possibly less-than-interesting acquirements (note: I don’t go out and spend money on any new CD I would ever want. I will just say that Record Collector is the most amazing used record-store in existence, and than my friends are generous in their burning music for me. Also, quite a few of these were gifts in themselves, came from gift cards, as well. Some of the foreign ones, I caved and downloaded. Oh well. Obsession hurts):

Blonde Redhead – Misery is a Butterfly

the Beatles – Let It Be…Naked

Benjamin Britten – Cello Suites 1-3 (de Rohem)

Buffalo Daughter – Captain Vapour Athletes

Buffalo Daughter – Socks, Drugs, and Rock’n’Roll

Dismemberment Plan – The Dismemberment Plan is Terrified

Dismemberment Plan – Emergency & I

Dismemberment Plan – Change

Brian Eno – Another Green World

Enon – Believo

Enon – In This City

Enon – Hocus Pocus

the Flaming Lips – Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots

Franz Ferdinand – Franz Ferdinand

Hooverphonic – A New Stereophonic Sound Spectacular

Interpol – Turn on the Bright Lights

Kronos Quartet – Nuevo

Modest Mouse – the Lonely Crowded West

Modest Mouse – the Moon and Antarctica

Number Girl – Sappukei

Number Girl – Num-Heavymetallic

the Pixies – Death to the Pixies

the Pixies – Purple Tapes

Rasputina – How We Quit the Forest

Rasputina – Cabin Fever

Rasputina – Thanks for the Ether

R.E.M. – Murmurs

Sigur Ros – Aegetis Bjurn

Stereolab – Mars Audiac Quintet

Stereolab – Dot and Loops

Stuart Davis – Nomen est Numen

Yann Tiersen – Rue des Cascades

Yann Tiersen – Tout est Calme

I was thinking of inserting a list of all of the groups/artists I’d generally discovered just in the past two semesters, but that would be an awfully long list that only I would end up examing. Hmm. Oh well. Here’s one, anyway.

Ampop, Belle and Sebastian, Blue Oyster Cult, Dismemberment Plan, Brian Eno, Enon, Iggy Pop, Interpol, Kimono, Maus, Mates of State, Matmos, Minus the Bear, Modest Mouse, Mogwai, Noir Desir, Neutral Milk Hotel, Number Girl, Rasputina, Royksopp, Six Parts Seven, Stereolab, Television, Yann Tiersen.

Oh god. I had more to blog about. Definitely, I did. I’ve just been unpleasantly distracted, though, and am now contemplating packing up a few necessary belongings and just roaming the earth by foot, where I can’t encounter people or make them think or worry over me.

Or I might just go cry.

This sucks. I hope this is my last day of crazy.

Omoi Desenaiyo!!

listening to: shiina ringo – yattsuke shigoto

YES! I finally remembered the Japanese for “lyrics” without having to look for it first!!!

Shut up. It makes me happy.

Oh my god! Turtle Island String Quartet seems to have acquired a new violist (one I would like to marry, personally). It always freaks me out when I don’t see them or anything of them for a while and then–BAM!! New member. Mark Summer will always be my hero, though. Just…Mark Summer. That’s all. I think I need to go listen to some TISQ and obsess over rhythm again for a while…

I think this extensive phone-tag ordeal is almost at an end. It will be tomorrow afternoon, most definitely. Aaah!

Hmm. I’ve been translating quite a lot in the last couple days, but I think I’m becoming extensively lazy. There are times when I won’t know the furigana-less kanji outside of the regular printed text, and either ignore it or insert whatever I think is closest without checking. I think maybe I’m discouraged because reading Yamada Nanpei’s small-print hand-written kanji is freaking hard to do. It’s so compact and just…difficult to read. I’ve started reading HanaKimi again, and am shocked and amazed at how much easier it is to read the small-text. Also how her free-talks are half the size in the same amount of space. Holy crap. I would love to translate the free-talks someday, but my kanji-identification skills aren’t all that great…

Which reminds me…I need to look something up while I’m here…something I can never remember no matter how I try…

Ah! Here we go. Hottoke:

“Hottoku” is a colloquial expression of “hotteoku”. “Hottoite” is the ~te form of the verb “hottoku”. It indicates a request in informal speech. “Yo” is a sentence ending particle which emphasizes a command. “Hottoite yo” sounds feminine, so a male speaker would say “hottoke yo” or “hottoke”.

Every time I try to look up “hottoke” on my super-J-E dict, the results only come up with “hotcakes”. I hate that.

I hate colloquial expressions I can’t identify without google-references, in general.

Okay. Ittekuru!


I don’t like telephones. I’m currently playing one major game of phone-tag, which has been going on for the last maybe week or so. It’s annoying as HELL. I have this tendancy to coordinate being in the shower with receiving phone-calls. Especially with my cell-phone. It’s annoying as effing hell. During school it was a little different. I would see every damn college student to pass me talking to somebody on their cell-phone, which is usually when I make the realization that my cell-phone has not received or dialed anyone in what usually ends up being periods of two weeks or more. I had many opportunities to contemplate chucking my cell-phone into the Iowa River over the past two semesters.

Yeah. Hopefully this phone-tag thing will end, soon.

I saw the Triplets of Belleville last night, which I enjoyed. The style, animation, and music was simply awesome, and so to complete my movie-watching experience, I’m going to totally ignore the way it was wrapped up. I won’t even mention it. La-lala.

Arg. I’m too distracted by this phone-tag ordeal to blog right now. AAAH.


music: yann tiersen – monochrome (live@black sessions)

Okay, so Jamie put part of the letter from her JET predecessor in her lj, and I really enjoyed reading it. Not only because it gave me a nice insight into where Jamie’s going to be next year, but because I read that this junior-high school’s cafeteria is called “the Dream Room“. Oh my god. To me, that equates to eating in Harvard’s very Hogwarts-esque freshman dining hall, even though I’m quite aware it’s just a name.

So last week JaMeg had rented an amusing tape of Gakkou e Ikou from Akemiya, which had contained a segment with “mazakon”. Before this point, I’d had no idea that mazakon was short for “mother complex”, and found these actual mother-son relationships to be pretty sad (ie, 18-year old boy is too lazy to cut food for himself so he calls his mother who runs directly home to help him, or a different mother writes out mapped instructions to nearest train-station and calls her son “macchan”). Then last night, I was translating Koucha Ouji. And…yeah. I’m finally getting to interesting Ouji-related matters. Earl Grey finally meets up with his younger sister. Who um, sort of made things a little bit “fufu” with her “oniisama”. So then Assam (who apparently has never gotten along with Orange Peko) trips her and says (the first word in katakana) “burakon buri dana”. Okay, first of all, Assam, I love you and second of all, WTF kind of word is BURAKON?!

Well, it’s certainly not a dictionary sort of word, or so I immediately discovered. Right before getting to my google-friend for help, the thought hit me that MAYBE “burakon” was somehow related to “mazakon”, and actually meant “brother complex”. DOH, Japan!! So after a bit of googling, I found a few Japanese pages that read “brother complex” and concluded that this was the mystery katakana word. Okay, so the meaning is nothing like “imekura” or “image club” if you recall, but it’s still very much like “DOH, JAPAN!!”.

My permalinks don’t seem to be functioning. Like, somewhere along the way, a url setting has been scrambled. I’m sure this is something I can fix on my own, but damned if I know how to work a lot of the ftp paths in blogger settings. It’s just frustrating because I actually use them occasionally to refer to entries.

I hate waiting for things. Like phone-calls. Hate it.


music: hooverphonic – shake the disease (depeche mode cover)

Rejoice! I am connected from home! Yaay!

I feel much better than I have been. Perhaps that’s because I finally went running. It was a really good run. No Iowa River run, but it certainly did count for something. I had to start from a low-point since it’s been a couple weeks. I made it for 28 minutes, which isn’t too bad. I’m hoping I can get back up to near 40 by the time I leave next week.

Currently, I’m sitting here wallowing in blog-happiness. My parents are across the hall watching Wonder Boys, which I had started watching with them. I feel I should say that I love Wonder Boys, and that I really ought to read the book. Anyway, yeah. Toby Maguire, whoo! And…we’re not talking super-hero or action-jockey Toby Maguire. We’re talking effed up, drug-sucking, ambitious-writer Toby Maguire. Aaw, but he’s still cute.

I’m also really starting to look forward to Madeline Island. I think I’ve covered this already.

I’ve been translating a lot of Koucha Ouji. Why? Well, there’s no real reason. But, translating is fun, it’s occupying, it’s excersizing my Japanese, and hell if it doesn’t just enforce the fact that I’m KO binge-ing at the moment. I won’t get into the last chapter, at the moment, but there’s any entry a-comin’. I’ll just say that I may have been driven to writing fanfic. Arg, yeah.

Uuhm, distractions.

Originally Typed 2:30pm, 5/28/04


My household is still very much without any sort of connection. It’s a little bit frustrating, because I’ve basically been reduced to translating and playing Chrono Trigger. Which is even a bit less of a life than I normally have. Which is just plain sad. There might be hope for a working connection some day soon were it not for the fact that my Dad is still in Indiana. He’ll be getting back tonight. Maybe he’ll yell at a Verizon-related person, tomorrow. My mom is…well, first of all, I don’t think she cares. Then, I’m not sure she’s reached computer-savvy-mother status, yet, either. An exchange had yesterday at some point…

Me: Mooom! Our internet connection seems to have died!

Mom: Really? Did you try Netscape instead of Internet Explorer?

Me: … Um, no, I meant, our CONNECTION seems to be busted. Meaning that regardless of which browser I use, I can’t connect to the internet.

Mom: Don’t we have dsl?

Me: …when’s Dad getting home again?

So here is connection-less blog entry, to be posted, eventually.

As for me, I’m pretty crazy right now. I’m a kind of unfortunate combination of restless, bitter, sleepless, anxious, and well um, when you combine the aforementioned you get the crazy. I could explain each one of these characteristics of crazy and why I am suffering from them, but I think I’ll save that for another time. I will only mention that I made the best music mix as a tribute to my current state of being. I call it “Mix for the (Mentally and Musically) Going Crazy”. It’s a collection of rhythmically active samples that just go crazy. It’s about half rock half electronisized (somehow). Some Enon. Some Plan. Bjork and (old/weird) Hooverphonic. It’s just good. If I knew everybody reacted to music the same way I do, I would offer copies of this to the world, just for some insanity-commencing fun.

I leave for Madeline Island in a week. Unlike last year, I feel no dread about leaving. In fact, I think on some weird level I’m desperate to get out of here. Buah, but never mind this. I’m just having a very weird Spring. There are a lot of moderately sized mind-rats running around and gnawing on parts of my brain. Maybe Madeline Island will be my brain exterminator and relieve me of all of these little nasties. I wish I didn’t stress out so easily, though. I think there is some correlation between my Spring Semester 04 Straight A’s and my relitively high blood pressure.

Again, I want to see people, but at this point I’m afraid everyone’s either avoiding me because I suck or probably relectant to see me because they are aware that I’m turning into a freak.

I’m going to try and get to my mother’s office again at some point to at least check and see if important stuff has reached me via email, and maybe just read the last three days worth of news. Boingboing makes me so happy.

I Am The Existenceless Loser.

listening to: the hum of the orange imac

Nope. Still no internet. Currently, I’m sitting in my mom’s cluttered office and watching the sunlight creep slowly out of the room. I wrote a really weird offline blog entry of sorts earlier today that I’ll have to post if there’s actually ever some sort of connection in our house before I leave next week.

Uuum, what’s new? I have this long list of fangirlish stuff I feel a need to blog about. Most of it (as I’m sure was mentioned in every other previous not-from-my-house entry) being directly manga-related. The weather’s been nice. Been eating a lot of good food. Unfortunately none of this changes the fact that I haven’t been sleeping much at all. I don’t know if it’s because my system hasn’t adjusted to the not-in-school factor or my surroundings or whether I’ve just become a sick insomniac of sorts. Whatever it is, I miss the feeling of being fully rested. Cello seems to have come to a screeching halt. That’ll have to change in the next day or so, since I supposedly have a lesson on Monday. More about that at a later point in time. Generally, I feel useless and shut in.

I must say, having no internet in our house does not help this. I know that my sitting around writing blog entries, scrounging blogs and news sites only contributes to the shut-in factor, but at least with those I feel as though I have some existence and continuation from what I’d already been doing through most of the semester. Without at least being able to live up to my normal bush-button publishing, I feel like I’ve lost my only means of contact with the world. I feel existence-less. I don’t think I like this entirely, but it’s evident to me that my blog is sort of my existence-verification method. Without it, I’m just a listless loser with that ever-present chatter in my head, never shutting up.

I think I’m going to be especially appreciative of actually doing something next week. It’s not going to be anything like last summer, and for that I’m glad. Maybe it’ll be a good experience. Maybe it will make me 100% no-longer-bitter about everything (in case nobody was aware, I’m currently really bitter at everything. Watch your back *flashes spork*).

Cram it, world!

The Best Entry Ever…Coming Soon!

Aaaaaaaaah!!!1! Working connectioooon!!

Too bad the working connection thing still isn’t happening at MY house. I’m currently at JaMeg’s, awaiting Megan’s arrival home from work so we may continue watching what we started of RotK last night.

Damn. Too bad a) Megan’s back (ahaha, not really) and b) I can’t frigging remember specific things I wanted to blog about, or I’d have the best entry ever.

No. Right now, RotK.

Later, the best entry ever.

Aside: I’m having raging fangirlish cravings for X-Files. Somebody, help!

Aiyaa Aiyaa Aiyyaaaa!

Again, with the not blogging.

This time because our internet stuff at home seems to be busted. Current, I’m sitting in my mother’s office, thinking of stealing her iMac for no other reason than it is bright orange.

I wouldn’t be blogging at all except for the fact that I DESPERATELY needed a phone-number somebody emailed me. Now I have it. And I have blogged a few words. So now I must go.

Hopefully, hopefully hopefully, home internet stuff will start working and I can rant about a lot of manga stuff.

Otherwise, people should contact me.



listening to: tori amos – bachelorette

Aaargh! I have the most gigantic blog entry to fill in but I am being so THOROUGHLY DISTRACTED! AAARGH!!H!

Things I will blog about later: Koucha Ouji, Music schtuff, my sister and her awesomeness, sleep patterns.


Perhaps My Brains Have Turned To Sand

listening to: television – marquee moon

Hmm. You know, I don’t know why I bitch and moan about the happenings in my life so much and feel so damn insecure when I have such a friggin’ awesome collection of music. Seemingly irrelevent I know, but I have really great stuff to listen to, and I should take comfort in it and be proud of it, because it’s not for nothing, right? Yeah, I know the corelation between these things is almost completely obsolete, but it does make me feel better about crappy stuff. This is what I was thinking, last night while I was laying in bed and listening to Eno.

I mean, music has been this important to me for so long. I’ve obsessed and toiled and beaten my own brains out trying to figure out why I like the things I do, and have probably discovered more music than I had ever imagined in the process. I think that I have every right to be emotionial or even downright selfish, but hey, you’ve got to do what you can for yourself on the necessary level. Or whatever.

Also, I’m going to take this moment to point out to myself that, as opposed to what I had originally thought, theoretically analyzying music that’s in pop-song-format does not detract from my listening experience. It does not make songs quickly come to a boring halt. It does not make me go crazy over the actual process of analysis. It enhances the experience. Especially when I find something good. So…go me, or something.

I was also thinking of albums I really want to get my hands on:

Television – Marquee Moon

Beach Boys – Pet Sounds

Stereolab – Emporer Tomato Ketchup

Others that I feel I want on a less urgent level:

Sigur Ros – Ba Ba Ti Ki Di Do

Modest Mouse – The Lonesome Crowded West (I’m trying not to let their popularity effect my good opinion of them)

Brian Eno – Before and After Science

Music. Droooool.

Sigh. My poor boring blog….

Another Green World

listening to: brian eno – golden hours

So today I got my wedding-check cashed and drove to Borders to finally purchase what I knew my music collection needed to further complete itself: Brian Eno’s “Another Green World”. Oh my god.

Maybe this is a bold statement, bu it ranks up there for one of my favorite albums, that’s for certain. One thing that made me certain I would like Brian Eno before having discovered favorite songs or listening to full albums. From enoweb, I came across this under the “lyrics” section of the site:

“Many musicians look on their lyrics as poetry that reveals their inner depths. For Eno, though, the sound of the words in sequence is what matters. He reacts against the idea that the lyrics are the “meaning” of the song: in his view, the lyrics are just another component, along with the sound of the guitar or the rhythm of the piece.”

I’ve argued about this with myself quite a lot, the importance of lyrics vs music to myself as a listener. Finally, I think I’ve come to a conclusion (though by no means definite) of sorts to the matter: the initial basis for which I like music relies completely on my ear and what it tells me, musically. I can’t ignore something I find to be musically engaging, and the initial period in which I try to musically understand something usually does not encompass the words to a song. However, I have found that many extremely musically and wonderful artists have this tendency to be poetic, effective, and even completely lyrically brilliant. I like what I hear, and more often than not, lyrics unfold themselves right in front of my eyes while I’m listening to what is musically being said.

However, I was drawn to Eno because of his history as an artist, and this attitude of going for finished product that put lyrics on a similar level as the rest of the music, and not making them the basis for the song. In a way, it represents a lot of how I feel about my own music and what I make of it.

I like the progressions. I like the layered electronics. I like the instrumentation. I like that he does almost all of this himself with the help of people here and there. Eno is doing what I want to do, and hearing this music and reading of how he came up with it and experiencing the chords and the words is reinforcing my what I suppose you could call “policies” and ideas.

More on Eno, later.

Fucha Fucha Fucha

listening to: tori amos – spring haze (live)

I was going to blog about some interesting crap.

But now I think I’m going to go and play Chrono Trigger.


YO MA MA (aka, Death By Swiftly Approaching Storm)

listening to: swiftly approaching thunder

I hold in my hands (well, I mean, when I’m not typing) a program autographed — by YO-YO MA! AAAH! I’m going to have to scan it and worship it and make a layout out of it or something. It says (or I think it says…): To Talia. My fellow cellist – All best – Yo Yo. I didn’t meet him myself, but my Dad did. My Dad is the best! I should add this to my collection of programs signed by never-met but no less famous and amazing cellists. I have one by ROSTRO-FREAKIN-POVICH!!!!1!

And just think! It’s like…the six degrees of the West Wing! My dad met and talked to Yo-Yo Ma, who in turn has probably met and talked to Bradley Whitford (whul, all the cast of WW, but we’re all big Bradley Whitford fans over here…) from WW because of Noel (that WAS the ep, no?) and…so if you know me, you can say you have some very foreign and useless connection to any of the aforementioned.

I’m a nerd.

Anyway, I saw Yo Yo Ma, and my first thought was “I would steal that cello” “he’s so good and happy and he’s probably the reason I’ve played the cello since I was five”. But I also have this thing in which I don’t believe famous people actually exist. This doesn’t say a lot about my tendancies of self-deprication, I know, but it’s just hard for me to believe that people I really admire and have accomplished things are also human beings. Yo Yo Ma was the most human of all of the famous people I’ve ever seen from afar.

Alright. I’m done. I’m going to go stare at this program and think about how this cello-playing guy I admire actually signed it for me, even if I never actually got to meet him.

I’m also going to sit in my basement while a series of very violent storms tears through the area. They’re a’comin. Time for some Brian Eno.

Disco vs. Motown, Arranged For The Jnr High Choir…

listening to: dismemberment plan – memory machine

The Plan = *heart* It’s too bad they broke up like a month before I discovered their existence. But oh well. Travis Morrison seems to be doing things and putting those doings on the web, which I like. Mmm. Sample-music.

So, I’m playing bass for the Metcalf choir concert. And…yeah. It’s a “Disco Medley”. Considering the fact that last year they did a “Mo-Town Medly, I am not complaining. The music isn’t by any means difficult, but…disco lines for bass belong to Satan. Constant, insane, neverending 8th-note octaves. I thought I’d had my fill with Footloose, too. Hmph. In any case, it’s fun, and I like working with Mrs. Corpus. And the kids are just so cute. Hee!

My phone-conversation with mystery-person was extremely good. Yeah, mystery-person is acquanted with my sister, and is an alum of Oberlin, too. So I will be glad to become further acquainted with him, so perhaps he’ll be less…mysterious.

As for my being completely insane, AAAAAAH! Okay, enough with blogging my insanity.

Hum. You people don’t know what in Samuel Langhorn Hell I’m blabbering about. Feel lucky.

Juju Space Jazz

listening to: kronos quartet – marquee moon (television cover)


But I am, however, supposed to be receiving a phone-call. From some guy I’ve never met. It should be interesting.

You know, I wish being crazy meant that I was filled with some sort of significant other-worldly information which was the source of my craziness. Like any number of X-Files episodes. So even being posessed would make freaking out seem more interesting and worth something.

This sucks. Ala Talia.

The Clock Is Set For Nine But You Know You’re Going To Make It Eight

listening to: interpol – leif erikson

Do you like how I keep leaving song lyrics with no explanation? I can’t help it. I just listen to things and the music sinks in, followed by the words, which just sort of insert themselves into my head and begin to make sense…

For one brief, fleeting moment, I thought I might get to meet Yo-Yo Ma, tomorrow. And I’ve heard he’s so unbelievably nice, too.

My dad recorded this DVD from VHS of Yo-Yo playing with the Copenhagen orchestra, on baroque cello. Haydn D major. He looked so happy. He and the first violinist kept looking at each other and playing off of each other, like “here, I’ll hand this cadence over to you, now”. Even the conductor. It was all so happy I wanted to cry.

Urk. I’m such a selfish brat. I wish I could *whack* think of *whack* something other than *whack* my self! *whack*

So, apparently cicadas are a potential Atkins friendly diet option, what with their being low in fat, high in protein, and containing no carbs. Interesting. Also interesting is the fact that a guy in Indiana had a major allergic reaction from eating 30 of them. Isn’t society a sad, sad thing? (link to first and second boingboing entries).

I hate not sleeping and over-thinking and going crazy over things people shouldn’t have to go crazy over more than once.

But on the other hand, I like Brian Eno, thunderstorms, and especially deserted japanese islands (via

I Wanna Remember To Remember To Forget You Forgot Me

listening to: modest mouse – a different city

Pardon this entry for its trite assumptions of my own character. And its crankiness. Rrr.

I sure have been blogging an awful lot. It’s not as though I have anything better to do accept sit around and play Chrono Trigger, or contemplate ways of making life more interesting but then end up reading instead, which isn’t wholly bad. I’m terribly bored. I’ve convinced myself that on some level, life will never acheive a more interesting status than its current one. Which is hopefully untrue, but extremely depressing when I dwell on the prospect.

I’d like to see people, as in friends I haven’t seen since practically last summer. But I also have this annoying habit of convincing myself that if people haven’t already made the effort to see me, themselves, or at least you know, paid attention to the fact that I do indeed exist on some level, I automatically convince myself that nobody wants to be bothered by the likes of me. Which…well…i HOPE that’s wrong. I just manage to live in these unbelievably unhealthy ideas “I want to see my friends” and “I don’t want people to have to suffer from my presence”.

I’ve really confused myself with my “I hate people and need solitude” tendancies. I think a lot of that attitude has owned me for quite a few years. Now I feel bad because I think it has also contributed to my current “sitting alone in my parent’s house” factor. It’s just difficult when I generally like solitude but can’t have the kind I want at home, and then really need to have some social-life but am mostly stuck with my parents in that respect. Then I start blogging constantly and mindlessly, mostly to verify my existence through updates on a webpage, and probably hoping on some level that somebody will read and understand and let me know that they read and understand.

I think I’m also just cranky because I still have weird and important cello-related crap to take care of that I don’t want to have to take care of.

Oh well. At least when I whine on my blog, it does make me feel better on some level. Rrrr.

Silly Rabbit. Tricks Are For. Kids.

listening to: stereolab – miss modular


Watched the first Gakkou e Ikou in a very long time with the JaMeg. And pleasing to my expectations, it did not suck. In fact, most of it was downright entertaining. Any game involving members of V6 will probably result in approval. Especially when it involves “deko pen”(?)…

Then I trotted home and finally finally watched Kill Bill. Which…aah! Why couldn’t I have seen it sooner?! Translates to: I enjoyed it a LOT. And the nice thing about having waited so long to see volume 1 is that I don’t have to wait to see volume 2. Something sad is that the first time I even heard of the existence of this film was during 7:30am rhetoric, where our teacher asked us what we thought of all of this Kill Bill craze. At which point, I only knew of the subject matter to be a gory film people seemed obscenely disgusted by. This was followed by my hearing of it from (and probably shifting to “popularity means I don’t need it” indifference because of) the guys on my floor. But…now I’ve seen it and aah! Maybe it’s all in my head, but I have a particularly high tolerance for gore and weird crap, for a girl. In fact, you could even say I like gore and weird crap, particularly the way it was presented in this movie.

This coming week will be good. I may, in fact, end up pretty much living with Jamie and Megan, if this is at all possible. As much as I respect and love my parents and whatnot, AAAAAAAAAHGETMEOUTOFHERE!!!!1! Ahem, that is all.

And We Saw St. Elmo’s Fire Splitting Ions In The Ether

listening to: brian eno – st. elmo’s fire

I love this song so much. Some music I really like for reasons of standing out within a particular style of music. This stuff goes way beyond style.

Went to Tachibana with the family to “celebrate” my passing music theory so unbelievably well. I had unaju (eel) for the first time in a very long time and UMAIIIIIII! Eel may not look too appetizing, but believe me, if prepared the Japanese way, it is divine.

Something I failed to mention about this doctor’s appointment I had, yesterday…I had to have them fill out a form for Madeline Island, and when my mom was looking over it, she commented on how high my blood pressure was. It must be still moderate and healthy, since the nurse never mentioned anything about it, but it’s kind of unsurprising. I went CRAZY in the last month of school. STARK RAVING MAD. My blog reflects very little of the crazy I went, you lucky readers, you. If high blood pressure is all that I’ve escaped with, I’m thankful. For a while I was concerned I may have just keeled over and writhed for a while before dying, or something unfortunate like that. I hope in the coming weeks that I can do a good deal to relax and have not-high blood pressure.

That’s all for now. I’ll come back later when I have more to insert.


When The Sound Of Laugher Makes You Sick And Snide You Know You’ve Got The Jitters

listening to: yann tiersen – monochrome (live at black sessions)

Screw blogging hiatus. It’s easier not to want to blog five times a day when I actually have things to do. At very least, not blogging for two days has given me a moderate build-up of things to ramble about.

My grades have been posted on Iowa’s student site and…go me!1!









16 hours Spring Semester (17 if you count chamber music which I was never registered for), 3.78 GPA. Eat it, college. But judging from this, I’m only going to be resenting the lazy, unmotived, drunk students more than I already do. And, well…that’s not saying a whole lot.

Okay, one thing I’m wondering, how in seven hells did I get an A in theory?! I still don’t believe I understand half the material that’s been taught to me, despite a miraculous ability to not do miserably on assignments. Which is enough of a reason why I think I shouldn’t have gotten an A. Aside from that, I freaking did not turn in one of the last assignments because I’m stupid and simply forgot I needed to go to a TA office and be like “here is my last and very-much completed assignment”. That and I was so apathetic at that point that it didn’t matter. I suppose I’m forgetting that aural skills was a big part of the grade, and I always did well in that. So anyway, my family totally needs to take me out to dinner or something, because music theory has had a history of being much like Math, with our family. Hated and confusing.

On another note, I’m downright skippy that I got an A in Japanese. I’m just sad I won’t be taking 3rd-year next semester. I mean, it might fit into my schedule, but I’m already taking 17 hours. Holy crap! I’m thinking of emailing Yuasa-sensei to see if I can arrange anything (the deal is that only 2nd-year students who got As or high Bs can advance onto third-year becuase the course-work becomes much more difficult and…well…2nd-year itself was pretty hard, too. I feel like I should want to pursue further, especially because the Asian Languages dpt is so awesome).

I had my first physical since I was about thirteen, yesterday. The verdict: physicals suck. But being completely healthy is dandy. I finally finished my series of Hep B shots (it actually took me FIVE YEARS to finish those…), which was painful but I suppose necessary? My arm is unbelievably sore, today, though. So…don’t punch my left arm, no matter what you do. Or I might cry.

I Find You Agreeable, Blogger…

I’m worried for this sad, old iMac. Grinding CD-ROM drive noises are not something I’m used to hearing out of this machine. I have to say, after nine months on OS X, I’m convinced of its efficiency (it just takes getting over the way things look). I just hope my dad takes his own advice and buys himself a nice, shiny, 60-pound eMac for home use.

In the mean-time, my search for a new bicycle is well under way. I’ve always loved biking, and I’d really love trying to get into it more seriously someday. I have no problems with my current bike. It’s taken six years, and is holding up extremely well, even with the added consideration of high-school vandilism from a few years back. The main reason I need a new bike is that I’m definitely not the same height I was when we first bought the thing. No seat or handle bar adjustments will compensate for the height that I’ve gained since we bought it.

My dad and I went off to Vitesse and Wilson’s, this afternoon, just to see what’s out there. I think I’ve narrowed down a few models that come at reasonable prices. Three of them are Treks, one is a Gary Fisher. They’re all hybrid bikes. That’s okay, but the newer styles of hybrid bikes are more like comfort bikes. The handle-bar height is adjustable, but generally comes pretty high. That’s something I’m not so certain I like. My mother was surprised when I said I liked riding with my head lower, and my body more parellel to the ground. But I don’t think my mother understands that I have this tendancy to go as fast as conditions will allow.

Another thing I’ve been thinking about is…well…another main reason I’m looking for a bike now is that I had plans of taking it with me to Madeline Island. Cool, but I’m not really certain what kinds of roads they have. They could be gravel or dirt for all I know, so I’m thinking perhaps a mountain bike is more the way to go. Also, in going to Upstate New York and riding on the tow path, I would definitely think of taking interest in more of a mountain bike. The tow path is this 12-mile-long road –consistencey varying from dirt to gravel to sand in some places– which follows a canal from Boonville to Forestport. It’s a really fun ride. Especially when you come across these impossible pits of sand, which generally result in either falling or walking. Sometimes to avoid them you can ride on the high shoulder of the road. If the ground is moist, usually the high shoulder works. But if it’s been dry, chances of finding loose sand and earth are greater, also improving the chances of falling into the canal. Mmm. Fun.

Rrrr! I’d better get to Upstate NY this summer!!

A lot of blogs I read are powered by Moveable Type, and it’s been interesting to follow how people are reacting to Moveable Type jacking up their prices. Yeah. I’m awfully glad that Blogger isn’t pricing their blogs. But I think Moveable Type advertises itself as more of a tool for big time moderators and businesses, as opposed to people keeping personal sites. I know by hearing it from others, and also by seeing so much more of it with Blogger Relaunch, that Blogger is user-friendly, and easy to set up, but still restricting in some ways, which is why I hear so many people have switched over to Moveable Type. In any case, I am making no plans of going elsewhere with weblogging. I think Blogger is enough of the user-friendly combined with personal options. It’s agreeable, really.

Woo!! Season finale of tWW tonight! I’m not certain it can be any LESS exciting than Gaza from last week was.

When You’re Lonely You Can Talk To Me

listening to: the beatles – hey bulldog

I don’t know why I even try blogging anymore.

I saw Van Helsing last night. And um…okay…well first of all, I am going to defend myself by making my main point of: HUGH JACKMAN. Uh huh. You read me. Anyway, I like weird sci-fi and horror, and I thought a lot of the art and style of this movie was kind of cool. The thing that bothered me the most was how…oddly the three “monster” stories were strung together. I think my main problem is that, especially with Dracula and Frankenstein, to me, these stories exist in their own seperate universe. Not the same one. I was a little bit annoyed by the were-wolf stuff, as well. And especially with interpretations of vampires. But…whatever. Again, I will say one thing: HUGH JACKMAN.

I think I am now approaching a point of full physical recuperation from school. I’ve started waking up earlier and have noted that I’m in a slightly less bad mood, generally. Well, not completely. Because now that I actually have energy, I find that I’m really restless.

I have to admit, there are two things that I was almost certain would happen to me upon my return home from school. One of these things is that I would become restless, and it would drive me stark raving mad. At school, I was busy. I mean, 17 semester hours plus practicing busy. So it’s always a shock to me when suddenly I have absolutely nothing to do. I think last year was worse, because the shock came from not traveling around for rehearsals (Chicago) and auditions (Ohio, Boston, Indiana, Iowa) and over the years I’ve figured out that I’m hypersensitive to location and traveling. In saying that, even being away from IC is causing me to react. Which is stupid. I never felt held back, there. Everything was within walking distance, and planned out days to just explore and walk around weren’t uncommon. And…as I’ve decided, that’s all I really need to be occupied. Walking and exploring. Oh well.

Thing number two: friends from high-school now have lives. Or…are continuing on with whatever lives they had before. I think I’m getting a little bit ahead of myself here because (a) not everybody is home from school yet and (b) it’s not like I have instant means of contacting people I miss and want to see. I mean, yeah, people have lives. I’m probably also overreacting because I had friends who were simply scampering past my door at Iowa, and now I have to return to a stage of feeling like I’m bothering people when I want to occasionally see them. So…I’m just going to tell myself to shut up on this one. When it’s August 20th and I haven’t encountered a single one of people I miss despite trying like hell, THEN I’ll whine.